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April Fools Zen
04/01/06April Fool's Zen
Q: What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor?
A: Make me one with everything.
Q: How many Zen masters does it take to change a light bulb? A: Two - one to change it, one not to change it
Q: How many Zen masters does it take to change a light bulb? A: None. They are the light bulb.
Q: How many Zen masters does it take to change a light bulb? A: Tree falling in the forest.
And now some Zen philosophy to enlighten your day...
Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just leave me the hell alone.
The journey of a thousand steps begins with a broken fan belt and a leaky tire.
It's always darkest before dawn. So if you're going to steal your neighbour's newspaper, that's the time to do it.
Always remember you're unique. Just like everyone else.
Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.
If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
Good judgment comes from bad experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.
A closed mouth gathers no foot.
We are born naked, wet, and hungry, and get slapped on the ass ... then things get worse.