Seasons of Love from the musical RENT, writen by Jonathan Larson

Company: Five hundred twenty-five thousand six hundred minutes Five hundred twenty-five thousand moments so dear FIve hundred twenty-five thousand six hundred minutes How do you measure-- measure a year? In daylights-- in sunsets In midnights-- in cups of coffee In inches-- in miles, In laughter-- in strife In-- five hundred twenty-five thousand six hundred minutes How do you measure a year in the life? How about love? How about love? How about love? Measure in love Seasons of love

Soloist #1: Five hundred twenty-five thousand six hundred minutes Five hundred twenty-five thousand journeys to plan Five hundred twenty-five thousand six hundred minutes How do you measure the life of a woman or a man?

Soloist #2: In truths that she learned or times that he cried In bridges he burned or the way that she died

All: It's time now-- to sing out Tho' the story never ends let's celebrate Remember a year in the life of friends Remember the love Remember the love Remember the love Measure in love

Soloist #1: Measure, measure your life in love Seasons of love Seasons of love

In diapers--reportcards In spoke wheels--in speeding tickets In contracts--dollars In funerals--in births

Five hundred twenty-five thousand Six hundred minutes How do you figure our last year on earth.

I wanted to post the lyrics before I composed how I spent last year.

I was a couch potato for the first half of 2005. Not because I wanted to be but because my health wasn't cooperating.(Depression/chronic fatigue/fibromyalgia)

Mom and I started talking about going on a trip to see a JBT concert in June; she'd never seen Clay live and this would be right up her alley. (She was 85) After a lot of discussion, she decided to have me go without her. My friends Carol and Agnes already had plans to go to NH and Boston so I joined them.

The day before I left, Mom found a big lump on the back of her hip. She didn't tell me; in fact, she didn't tell me until two days after I got back. She didn't want to spoil my trip.

The race was on ... removal of the tumor showed stage IV sarcoma, a rare form of connective tissue cancer. We opted for no treatment so that she would have as much quality of life as possible. Her sister and nephew has already planned a trip to visit from Montana prior to finding out about the cancer so Mom's goal was to make it long enough for their visit.

They arrived November 5th and we had a wonderful week although Mom was getting weaker by the day. We even had a surprise 86th birthday party for her. Family left on the morning of the 12th; Mom rolled over in bed that evening and fractured her hip. The cancer had obviously spread into her bones. We had a midnight ride by ambulance to the hospital and then they transfered her to hospice care on Monday afternoon.

Mom never met a stranger and was always upbeat. She even had the staff at the hospice fooled as to how sick she really was... they were talking about sending her to a nursing home because she was just too well to be in hospice care.

I was able to stay in the hospice with her the entire time. Each day she got a little weaker; Friday evening she mumbled "I think I'll be going soon". I took her at her word and stayed up with her until 3:30 AM. The nurse came at 6 AM and woke me and at 6:40 Momma was gone. My last wish was to be with her when she passed because I was not there when my father and brother passed.

Funerals during holidays are difficult; I scheduled the visitation for Friday evening and graveside for Saturday. Nine different ladies that Clay has introduced me to paid their respects; they also sent flowers to the hospice and yellow roses to the Funeral Home. It was a beautiful day, the minister read from Dr. Suess' "Oh the Places We'll Go" and my last minute singer substitute sang Amazing Grace acapella like an angel. Afterwards everyone was invited to Mom's favorite BBQ restaurant and we got to celebrate her life one last time. It was a glorious send off.

Cleaning up her condo, I found notes she had left behind for me, telling me she loved me. She dated the last one ... November 5th I believe.

I spent Christmas with cousins that I'd never celbrated Christmas with before. It was full of love. That evening I went to the movies with my cousin's grand daughter. We couldn't decide which one to pick so Heather made me draw ... I picked "The Family Stone". Good, a comedy! Welllll, not a total comedy as I found out. It was extremely emotional for me and I chose to stay because I needed a good cry. And to top it off, Luke Wilson looked like my brother half the time in that movie.

The last "physical" present Mom gave to me was my trip to see Clay in NH & Boston. Lemme tell you, she was so proud that she had done that for me! She knew how much Clay means to me. Then I was able to be with her when she made her transition, yet another gift. Seeing that movie on Christmas night wasn't a coincidence in my eyes, it was a gift. My mother's love hasn't died.

How do you figure our last year on earth? In love