Yesterday was fun. Back to real life and filling out papers and fun still like that. Hopefully I will have the luck I had earlier this year.

The ice show was fun. When my brain clears from the emotions from other stuff, I will write about it I'm sure. The singing was great. The skating of the skaters was great. I never knew how sexy some of those male skaters were. Woah. Clay looked good and sounded very good. So the special should be fun and maybe I will be on tv if I didn't break that tv camera. I really liked MCWL best because I am weird for liking how he was facing the side I was. I was supposed to be section 118 and they moved most of us that were in this section which turned to be a closer section 101. What sucked was during some of the sappier Christmas songs, I started to cry right there in the arena. It has not been an easy week and I don't know if I am strong enough quite frankly to deal with this all over again. What makes it doubly hard was it had nothing to do with my performance, but rather my "not fitting in." Funny, the big company I was with before paid good money to transfer me from KC to MI to keep me for the total of 2 and a half years. Funny, when I was a temp in the beginning at big company x, the big company jumped at the opportunity to make me permanent and pay off the BIG BUCKS to the contactor that was "leasing" me to them. This too will pass. I just feel between this, getting of my meds which had those nasty side effects show up, and the fires that I am wiped out.

So there ya go. Maybe I should cheer and go, "lookit me. I'm cool as damaged goods!"

This will pass...

LUV