Who loved every one of your sloooooooow sooooooooongs Who wishes that YOU were their sugar daddy Who was there when you had to tell that BIG secret

Only the Claymates

Who carried Radio Shack, Best Buy, and Circuit City in a bag Who needed binoculars on the third row Who cheered when you said ...anything

Only the Claymates

Who was man enough to say they like your music Who didn’t need a beer to enjoy the show Who loved the glint in their wives’ eyes when they watched you

Only the ClayDAWGS

Who paid $300(or $400 like me) for their seats and never regretted it Who will have every newbie’s email address, phone number, home address, and social security number Who just wanted to make the vertigo go away

Only the Claymates

Who now loves songs about butts, tractors, and handcuffs Who can’t say Krispy Kreme without saying macaroni and cheese Who has so much clack that they need another hard drive

Only the Claymates

Who can recite banter from an entire concert tour Who skips school and work to come see you Who came up with the word clack (no really who did?)

Only the Claymates

Who squealed with glee when you finally said MY Claymates Who giggled when you said you knew about the message boards Who cried at the last performance of BYLM in Florida

Only the Claymates

Who ripped Rippa a new one because she messed with OMC Who loved that imaginary illegitimate child because you were the “father” Who’s heart stopped when you couldn’t do the bus line in Cary

Only the Claymates

Who is completely silent at the first notes of LAA Who is thankful that Jaymes nagged you (remember CJ in Asheville) Who stops breathing when you say “I wanna share my everything.”

Only the Claymates

Who can say that they know more people by their screen name rather than their real name Who runs home to immediately check for your blogs Who knows that when you say “soon” it is code for NOT soon Who will settle for a one-line blog

Only the Claymates

Who wanted to be Tyra Banks!

Me!

pause for my ranting

Who boos other Claymates when they get a little attention Who writes letters calling you fat Who complains that they wanna hear you sing not listen to someone else tell a Christmas story

Mediocre not-quite-Claymates

now back to the regularly scheduled poem

Who plans out what they are gonna wear three months before they go to your concert Who can get clack up in 37.9 seconds after the concert is over Who can hold a cell phone up for 2 hours 15 minutes

Only the Claymates

Who has coined the word THUD as the sound we make when we “beat the floor (faint)” because of you Who can understand each other when saying OMG Q and A just sang IWKWLI with OMC and McVargas. It was amazing, I wonder if they are gonna do LAA, BYLM, ATD, or MOAM.

Only YOU and the Claymates

Who can “keep that clack steady” Who can go to your concert, sleep for 5 mins, get up and head to the next one Who can type 27 words a minute in the office and 100 words per minute in the chatrooms

Only the Claymates

Who can say that they see the same 300 fans at every concert What singer can say that their fans alone could give them the presidency Who can say that they make masses of women swoon with a flick of the mic

ONLY YOU CLAY, ONLY YOU