He won't let me stop being in love with him. I sit and watch and i think to myself the man would require a lot of tending then shake my head as i think there is nothing i would rather do then hold him and do what he needs me to.

I wouldn't even matter to me anymore.

So i stop watching and think on other things then he reaches back out and grabs me, yanking me back in and all i can do is let a few tears fall as he sings something like Lover All Alone.

It would be a beautiful, haunting song if he was just a singer among many but he isn't just a singer among many and i can hardly stand to listen to it as beautiful as it is because i almost had him out of my system. Now he's back and his voice holds me tighter then before. I wouldn't want to rid myself of it all if i thought for a second i would ever have the chance to do anything about how i feel.

I feel to much, to deep. This whole thing is insane.

The song sounds like he plucked out a piece of my soul and wrote it but i know he didn't he plucked out a piece of his own and helped write it. That makes it worse somehow. Then to hear him sing it.

Once again he haunts me.

Maybe if i could meet him i could find some fault i couldn't stand and he could go back to being "just another man" He's not just another man. His faults are more then ok because they are his. He's Clay Aiken and he's beautful in ways my world has never known. I want to know Clayton, i'd like to think because miracles happen i could. Maybe they could happen to me, but it hurts to much to hope.

I still can't stop watching.

He's Clay Aiken and his voice demands attention and his beauty demands to be acknowledged. I guess i have little choice but to acknowledge it even if it breaks my heart into one thousand pieces.

Clay Aiken is beautiful, let the world see it.

Rest gently Storm