Here is the letter to Clay Aiken I updated for the 3rd time:

Dear Clay Aiken, My name is Nichole Maria * ** and I'm a 17 year old from NJ that has a dream. My dream is to be a singer just like you. You are my role model and idol and I look up to you. When I read your book I was crying because some of the things in the book where somewhat of my life also. I was also picked on at school because I dressed and talked weird.

I couldn't help myself at all because I was different but I didn't care what people said anyways, but I did cry when I got home. I was made in front of all through my grammar and middle school years also because I was different and because I dressed differently then the other kids. I couldn't help myself that my mom dressed me in the wrong clothes. But I sure did believe in myself that I would graduate 8 th grade. I have more friends in high school now since I believed in myself and that's what you taught me, Clay. I love to sing also and you have inspired me to be a better singer and believe in myself and also a better person in life.

My life has been very miserable since my dad left my mom and my sis and I when I was 5. We are really not doing very well since my mom got in a car accident on September 25, 2003. Now my mom has brain damage kind of and can't remember some stuff that happens future tense now. We are trying are best to be the best family, but we are really in deep trouble with money also. I also have problems of my own.

I was diagnosed when I was about 10 years old with scoliosis. At age 13 I was diagnosed with eczema. I was also diagnosed with having anxiety attacks also. I have them in my sleep sometimes and it hasn't been solved yet to this day. I know how you feel when you are in a closed space and you would need to get out of a room because there is so many people in it. When I am on stage singing my heart out I feel more comfortable, but when it is in front of a class I am not able to do that.

At age 17 now, I was diagnosed with severe migranes causing my right foot to hurt a lot even my right leg too. When I wake up in the morning sometimes I don't feel that well to do anything, but I push myself to go to school to get an education. So, this means a lot to me to have my dream come true to be able to get to meet you, Clay, for me to be able to sing with you. I hope my dream comes true.

I have been trying my best just to meet you at least at a meet and greet, but it hasn't happened yet. You are like the best role model and idol I ever had in my life and you taught me a lot of things from your songs and from your amazing voice that you have. I wish you the best time with your time singing to all of us (ClayMates and ClayDawgs also) because I know I had a great time with your voice.

Love, Nichole Maria ** Nikki #1 Northern NJ ClayMate means last name