A short explanation

Before I begin, a short explanation:

Before I begin, I need to give you a short explanation.

American National Professional Photographers Association is the largest in this country and includes many from other nations. The organization is of great value to all who belong. Not only having a selected group of qualified people who specialize in various aspects belong to the Lecture Circuit, but their magazine provides valuable information. They also have a way of honoring those who give great deal of their time to help all who belong to both the National and the Affiliates. The highest honor is a large plaque given to the most valued member at conventions held at each affiliate.

We usually attended every Massachusetts Convention as well as the New England one and we were honored in several ways by being either a convention chairperson or receiving the "Best in Show" in the Portrait Division.

In 1983, we were at the annual Mass, Banquet and the chairperson that year made a long speech of that year's recipient stating it was the first time in history that a "couple" were to receive what is called: THE NATIONAL AWARD. Mel and I looked around trying to figure out who they were when all of a sudden we heard our names calling us to the head table to receive the award. I was shaking and crying the whole time and the pictures that they took were horrible. So the next day, one of the publicity photographers took a much better one of us holding the very large heavy wood plaque which is in the center of my wall here in my "award" room under my husband's larger Master of Photography framed award.

We overheard one at another table say: "it's about time". How nice!

The next couple of years went fairly smoothly with Mel suffering small attacks, but having the lake and wonderful clients made our lives interesting. Mel covered some of the most prominent weddings, and we were slowly going into our 35th anniversary of being Emmanuel College official photographer, as well as Harvard University official sports group photographer and the annual Harvard medical reunion where Mel frightened us all by standing on the highest ladder you ever saw to get every head seen in the various groups.

Soon it would be OUR 30th wedding anniversary and we decided to have our first real long vacation. Three weeks, sailing on the QEII which included a week in Hawaii. So, in 1984, we spent money on a real trip that did not include lecturing. We met celebrities on board, some who new Mel when he was in Ca. We went through the Panama Canal (8 hours) and loved Hawaii. We even took a plane trip to see the other islands.

In 1995, Mel received his highest honor by being asked to be a NATIONAL JUDGE in July of 1986. We had traded in our 20 foot RV for my dream 26 foot one with a bath and shower and large beds. It was gorgeous. July came and we drove to Chicago and rented a car so Mel could go from the RV Park where I would spend a couple of days doing bookkeeping, laundry , and other days went with Mel (they allowed me to watch the judging). There is no doubt Mel was not feeling that great, but his remarks were so fair, that the President that year wanted Mel to come back, he was that good. The last evening we had cocktails and many students were there. One asked a question and before I knew it, there were a circle of young people around me as I answered business questions. I was quite flattered.

The ride home was uneventful. I adored that RV. But Mel did not look good. He had some VIP weddings that summer and I insisted that his best friend (our top Candid Photographer) always be with him. He collapsed on one hot day (he always insisted on taking wedding groups in the shade while he was in the sun.) I got a call from the local hospital in that city while Al finished the wedding. Mel was transported to our local hospital and stayed for several weeks. He worked late August, then came Labor Day Weekend. He did not feel well and stayed at the ER with his heart Doctor for four hours, who told him to go to the lake as planned and have a good time.

I followed him in my Opel and by now he was on and off oxygen. We went to the RV park - a few miles from our Condo, and waited for our son to come. Before Labor Day, I made him his favorite chicken dinner, and he made plans to show some men where the radio control runway was the next day. On Labor Day we spent some time at the Lake , and he complained (after spending some time at the local hospital with chest pains.) I picked him up at 2 p.m.and that night he started to cry he hurt so much. The ambulance came again. I could not stay since I was up 36 hours. I was then awakened by the RV owner that the hospital wanted to talk to me. I dressed quickly and ran to their home, called the hospital and they simply said: "Oh, hello, your husband just died!"

I dropped the phone and in anger called his Doctor at his home and said: "thank you very much, Mel just died!". I honestly felt that the Heart Specialist just wanted his Labor Day Weekend, and told Mel to DRIVE anyway. He died from his condition AND the morphine that WAS NOT SUPPOSED TO BE GIVEN TO HIM.

I called my Condo friends who drove over right away, and by then Gordon was there and I called him. He came and got me, and my dear friends brought us food. I called my sister to make arrangements for graveside services. She certainly knew what to do, but since she received so many calls, she hired the large room for indoor services. I made them wait a day for an autopsy, went right to the studio and wrote his obituary and mailed it with his most recent formal portrait to all of the papers. They all used it, too.

Two days after the funeral, I went to the studio to make arrangements to postpone Emmanuel College sittings, and if we had more than two weddings booked had to hire other photographers since Al did one. I made Al change our phone message that I would be at the main studio three days, and the other one to do the finishing. I had the studio phone also ring at my home.

I never had a day off for several years, and worked 82 hours a week.

Enough for now, since I have so much more to tell you about how I changed my way of making living and started a whole new life as a widow.

Hope you will keep reading.

Thank you - all, Marian