Today the sun was shining but I didn’t notice
Today seemed to be the coldest day I have ever lived to experience. Will I ever warm up again?
Today the world seemed distant and blurred, I could hear it and see it but it didn’t make any sense
Today I grew up a little bit more
Today I learned how cruel life can be and how painful it is
Today I lost my hero
71 years 71 years is all my Grandpa could say today as we wept together in the hospital. What can you say to someone who is hurting so? Hurting more than you. But then, how could he be? You know he couldn’t be! There’s no possible way someone could hurt more than you and still be living.
Today I discovered what is feels like when your heart breaks
Today I was taught what it means to miss someone so badly it hurts to breath
Today I have cried more then I ever though humanly possible.
Today my worst nightmare became a reality
Today is a day for mourning
What could I have done differently?
Why couldn’t I have been there?
I knew this day would come; but can you ever be ready?
Why does it have to hurt so bad?
I’ve tried to stop myself from crying, but it seems I’m powerless
I’m surround by so many people, yet, I feel so alone
Can you ever go on?
Today I lost what was precious to me
Today I lost the one person that could make me smile no matter what I was going through
Today I lost someone I loved more then I could have ever told her
Today seems like the end of the world
My mind is running so fast I feel like I have lost it
Did the world stop turning today? Because it feels like it to me
When I go to see her, she won’t be there.
When I call her on the phone, there will be no answer
When I need a hug that only she can give, I will have do muddle through without
When I need to see that face that lights up ever time I walk in the room without fail, who will I go to?
The only way I will be able to see it is in my dreams
Who will teach me what’s important in life? Or tell me the story of how you named me?
Who will make me laugh at myself or make a crazy comment to lighten the mood?
Who will be there to bring the family together every year?
Who will tell me never to leave because she wants me here beside her?
Who will continue to teach me that my family is the most important treasure in the world?
I know we were your treasure.
Who will say “Oh Grandpa just do it” when Grandpa’s being suborn?
Who’s girl will I be now?
What will I do now, without you always being here for me when I need you?
One thing that will carry me through. All the wonderful memories I have with you. From going to get an acupuncture to eating lunch at home town buffet with Uncle Kenneth after a long morning of hard school work that you so willingly help me with. Eating popcorn until it was coming out our ears, while watching The Price is Right or Wheel of Fortune.
Skipping out on dates with my girls friends to go out with you and yours to Spangles for a burger and an ice cream cone to split. You were always my favorite girl friend anyway.
Trying to up together those crazy 10,000 piece puzzles and getting so confused we threw it all back in the box, say we did it and go have a bowl of Grandpa’s carefully made bean soup.
Or going shopping at Osco Drug and seeing that silly little stuffed dog with the heart in his chest pocket that says “I woof you”. You just had to buy it for me. :o) So many memories, but only so many I can handle without you here to reminisce with me.
How can someone be so special they touch every single life they come in contact with?
You were the bravest, strongest, most stubborn, loyal and caring person I have ever known. You always went out of your way to make people feels special, yet never told a lie.
I know one day I will see you again and we will get to spend eternity together. Until that day I hope to make you proud of me. One day I hope to be just like you.
I will miss you more then words could ever hope to express.
I love you Grandma!
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